ah, Warren Ellis never ceases to make me laugh…<\/p>\n
*<\/p>\n
It occurs to me that an awful lot
\nof trouble in Gotham City could
\nhave been averted a long time ago
\nif Batman had just ripped the Joker’s
\nnipples off.<\/p>\n
I mean, treatment doesn’t work,
\ndoes it? They stick the Joker in the
\nnuthatch, he comes out again and
\ndoes the same things.<\/p>\n
A man with the nipples ripped off him
\ndoes not make the same mistakes
\ntwice.<\/p>\n
Criminals are a superstitious,
\ncowardly lot, and need the nipples
\nripped off them.<\/p>\n
I mean, who’s going to argue?<\/p>\n
“Batman, I’ve heard disturbing
\nreports that you ripped the Joker’s
\nnipples off.”<\/p>\n
“Choke on my fuck, Commissioner
\nGordon.”<\/p>\n
“…okay.”<\/p>\n
I mean, crime in Gotham City doesn’t
\nexactly seem to be affected by a man
\ndressed as a bat flapping around the
\nplace. But no-one disobeys a man
\nwearing a necklace of human nipples.<\/p>\n
“I’m Batman” isn’t cutting it in the
\nstriking-fear-into-their-hearts
\nstakes. But “I’m Batman — and I’m
\nhere for your nipples” is an entirely
\ndifferent proposition.<\/p>\n
Criminals would see the error of
\ntheir ways after a man in a black
\nleather pervert suit had their
\nnipples off with the edge of a Batarang,
\nyou mark my words. Or a
\nBat-Denipplizer.<\/p>\n
I’m off to ring Bob Schreck at DC
\nComics.<\/p>\n
— W<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
ah, Warren Ellis never ceases to make me laugh… * It occurs to me that an awful lot of trouble in Gotham City could have been averted a long time ago if Batman had just ripped the Joker’s nipples off. I mean, treatment doesn’t work, does it? They stick the Joker in the nuthatch, he …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":14585,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9755","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9755","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9755"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9755\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14927,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9755\/revisions\/14927"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/14585"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9755"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9755"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thefatwebsite.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9755"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}