“Bah gawd! That human body has been broken in half! His face is a crimson mask!”
It’s Wrestlemania Weekend in Reynard Street and testosterone is running high. Erin left to hang out with her folks and left me, Matt and Mike to our own devices. So we’ve been eating pizza and watching lots of wrestling to count down to the big one on Monday morning.
Last night, I had a rumble with Matt and smashed my face in to the wall. When I got up, I was covered in blood. We called a cab to head to the hospital. Matt gave me a pack of frozen peas to try and slow the swelling on the right side of my face. Only problem was, it was an open pack so when I got in the backseat of the cab, I spilled peas everywhere.
We got to the clinic and it looks pretty dodgy. It’s called Betta Health (with a big tick next to it) and one of the doctors is called Doctor Blaze. It seemed the sort of clinic Doctor Nick Riviera would run or something.
I didn’t want to pay a shitload so I pretended to be Mike and used his MediCare card. The guy at reception asks me my name.
Me: …Mike Priest
Receptionist: Where do you live?
Mike: He lives on Reynard Street Coburg
Receptionist: Whats your phone number
Receptionist: Whats your date of birth
Mike: It’s June 23rd 1982….right Mike?
Very convincing. Mike’s MediCare card was expired so after that useless charade it didn’t even save me any money.
The doctor (sadly it wasn’t Doctor Blaze) took me in and gave an anasthetic needle to the eye (it was kind of prodding my eyeball there) and gave me 5 stiches.
I felt like a proper fool.
Wrestlemania Weekend continues today…