i feel really uncomfortable with this post. to be honest i hadnt checked the site for a few days… cause frankly i thought that there would be no updates (are there ever?). but oh boy was i wrong! now i just plain dont know what to write about… happy? sad? fuck it, i’ll give something a go:
i dont know how people feel about family holidays, i used to hate them… but i miss my parents these days and thus i’ll say that i like them. However, things are not quite the same when the family is not yours. For the past couple of days i’ve been at the beach (yes, i’m still in france for those who care), and let me tell you that the atlantic is fucking freezing!! The family that i am staying with took me to there beach house for a couple of days where i was met by another 5 non-english speaking cousins of various ages ranging from 7 to 1 years old… what joy. my only saving grace was that a friend of the family was staying with us… a 17 year old russian chick! ah, god does work in mysterious ways.
I’m now back at there house far away from the beach… and on day 12 it is slowly starting to become tiresome… shit living in another language is pure hell. The way i see it is that sure Edo, Pat and Sam have financial problems… but at least you can express yourselves without worrying about your vocab or your grammar or what fucking tense to bitch and moan in!!
i’m sorry, i know how shitty it can be when nothing is going your way… trust me. I know i’m just feeling frustrated and needed to outlet some of it. the fact is that, as angela said, i love you guys and right now your the only outlet i have… infact most of the time your the only outlet i have. i was showing this site to one of the people in my host family (Marion 16) and she was asking bout the people who update on this Blog section… it was kinda weird explaining how absolutely no one, except dan and edo, lives near anyone else… thats fucking depressing… now everyone’s talking bout getting jobs and moving on, thats some scary shit. i mean i remember when we used to have band practices at edo’s house during his IGCSEs!! or the times when we used to hang out at Tom’s appartment… every single night, eating at the night market. but thats all gone now… now its all “well today i spent the last of my money… its ok, food isnt really that important in the long run”. well, you know i’m the youngest member of this site and frankly, you guys have succeeded to scare the crap outa me!
I dont really know where i’m going with this and its long so i’m guessing that you’ve stop reading… but just take it from me, things have changed. but no matter where we are or what trouble we’re, in just role with it. you cant change the way things have been but you can change the way they will be.